Messages from heaven? Or am I just crazy?

I found a penny today
just laying on the ground
But it’s not just a penny
this little coin I’ve found

“Found” pennies come from heaven
that’s what my Grandpa told me
He said angels toss them down
oh, how I loved that story

He said when an angel misses you
they toss a penny down
Sometimes just to cheer you up
make a smile out of your frown

So don’t pass by that penny
when you’re feeling blue
It may be a penny from heaven
that an angel tossed to you.

- – - written by Charles L. Mashburn

Its a very nice poem and I have thought of it many times when I see a penny on the ground especially after my son Chris passed away almost 6 years ago. I know a lot of people think that when a loved one passes away they may return or send messages to you in the form of pennies or in the frequent appearance of an animal that they loved seeing in life.

I have a friend who believes that her dad sends owls to her and she sees owls very frequently, especially when she is missing her dad. I have had a little bizarre experience that has been going on now for about 4 years. It doesn't happen every day, not even every month. In fact sometimes several months will pass with out incident.  Let me explain with a little back ground.

When Christopher died I held onto his belongings for quite a while. I didn't want to give them away, I couldn't throw them away so I stored them. Looking at them was painful the thought of not having them was even more painful.

Finally I did manage to start getting rid of them I kept a few special pieces but the rest I found new homes for. I did the same with his toys. I kept his favorites but the rest I gave to his friends. 

Fast forward about a year. It began with his socks.  One day doing laundry I discovered one odd sock in the laundry, It belonged to Christopher. It was unmistakably his. His little feet were so small and his socks never fit anyone but his. I could not figure out how it got there. The interesting part was it was wet and dirty!

Christopher loved tramping about in the mud, the child's socks were terrible always wet always muddy. In the middle of a drought he could always find a mud puddle.  I puzzled over it , had a small cry and then I washed the sock. I mentioned it to Brent who laughed and told me I must have been mistaken. I began to think he was right because IT WASN'T IN THE DRYER! I don't know where it went, I never saw that particular sock again.

I was having an off kind of day and was missing my little boy a great deal that day. John said to me maybe it was his way of telling me he was still with me. I remember saying , but why a dirty sock why not a t- shirt?

Be careful what you wish for! Chris must have heard and now every so often one of his t shirts shows up in the dryer. Random odd socks still appear too but at least they are also clean and in the dryer.

Never in the laundry going in, always in the dryer. For a while I thought Brent was doing it. I have to admit I was annoyed, he claimed innocence but I still thought it was him playing a joke. Then Brent went away to University.  Two months after he left, guess what? a pair of jammie pants showed up.  The thing is many of the items that have showed up, I very clearly remember giving away. I remember crying over each piece , not wanting to part with any of it but knowing that I had to try and rebuild my life somehow and keeping clothing for a child who was never returning made no sense. Not only that Chris was a very giving child, He would want me to give the clothes away. That is just who he was. 

Fast forward to today and it is a beautiful day , perfect for laundry. As I take the the clothes out to the line, guess what , there in the bottom of the basket is Christopher's little gray and blue Pokemon shirt. It is wet but its clean. and I know darn well it was not in that load of laundry when I started the washer. The truth is this time of year always makes me think of Chris a lot. He died in August so warm weather and the date coming closer brings that on. Not that he is ever far from my mind, but I miss him more than ever in the summer. 

And maybe that is the point. Maybe he is trying in his own little way to let me know that he is still with me in a way I will never miss. Finding something of his when I am not expecting too, really sends that message home. At first it drove me nuts, but now 4 years after it started it brings me comfort. I began tucking the pieces of clothes that I found in a drawer, but they don't stay. Often when I go to add a new piece to the drawer there will be a few pieces found earlier, missing. 

I don't even try to fit my head around that one any more. I guess he just needed clean laundry? In any event it brings me comfort. and it doesn't matter if you believe me or not, Everyone in this house has experienced it  at least once.  So we know it is true. Has anyone out there ever had anything like this happen to them?